Brace yourself for a slightly nonsensical post. You've been warned.
Yesterday, while working at the library, I shelved a paperback and caught sight of one on my own--SEDUCED. My local library owns copies of JINXED, CHARMED, and SEDUCED. They ordered LASSO THE MOON. It should be in soon. Anyway, all three of my books have been missing from the stacks for a couple of months. Why? Because people keep checking them out! Woo-hoo!
JINXED and CHARMED are still out, but there sat SEDUCED right next to several Tom Clancy novels. I had a surreal moment. I mean I was there working as a library assistant, looking at a copy of a book I'd written, a book patrons keep checking out to read. So far, I think only one patron knows that Beth the library assistant is the same Beth who writes those funny, sexy romance novels. Luckily, that patron, loved my books. What's even nicer, is that she doesn't read romance--mine were the first. She typically reads mysteries or more mainstream suspense. Here I'd been worried that she'd be shocked by the graphic language and sex, but all she said was how funny and refreshing they were. A really great moment for me. But I digress...
So I'm standing there admiring my book sitting next to Clancy's book, and I had the overwhelming urge to skim a page--of me, not Clancy. So I did. The moment became even more surreal. I didn't recognize what I read. It's not like I wrote it ten years ago. SEDUCED hasn't even been out for a year. But as I read, well it was like reading someone else's book for the first time. I didn't remember writing these passages, although I know I did. I didn't recognize the way certain words were strung together. The thoughts. The actions. It didn't seem like something I'd write, but I did. I stood there, reading, thinking, "Who's this Beth Ciotta person?"
It was an incredibly strange feeling and it got me wondering, when I sit at my laptop and open my WIP, when the characters take over, when I'm in 'the zone'--am I really just in touch with another part of myself? The 'other me'? I confess, I'm still a bit weirded out by the experience. I'm thinking, I wish I knew the 'other me' a little better because she's ... I don't know, kind of cool. Hipper, edgier, funnier, deeper than the every day 'me'. The me I know.
Has anything like this ever happened to you? Have you ever done something or said something or wrote something and thought, where did this come from? Who is this person? Who am I? As I write this, my mind is wandering down the spiritual, paranormal woo-woo path. Maybe, just maybe, the 'other me' is a me from a past life. Maybe I'm benefiting from her experiences, her humor, her intellect. Whoever she was, I'm glad she was. She's helping me live my dream.
Hoping to read one of your screen plays one day. Better yet to SEE one!